10.09.20

Please send your application to work@home.co.uk

Towards the end of Summer, we asked poet and one of 2020’s Volunteers Coordinators, Ellie Reeves, to respond the Festival’s cancellation in her chosen medium. In this poem, Ellie reflects on change, career paths, and perfecting Mary Berry’s roulade in the time of Covid.

_______________________________________________

 

To whom it may concern,

I am applying for the role of

employed.

I am an ideal candidate as I have

bills, rent and an appetite

for Hovis Seeded Sensation –

61p pricier than ASDA’s own brand

and worth every penny.

 

Relevant skills:

My recent trip to ASDA

demonstrated excellent teamwork,

negotiating treacherous aisles

and suspect browsing fingers

to reach the Dolmio sauce

right     at the              back.

I pride myself on punctuality –

never a minute late for Wednesday 8pm

quiz-mania, treated with the utmost

sincerity. As with all important meetings

professional attire is required

(at least on the top half).

I’m not entirely sure if yelling

at Virgin Media over the phone

when the internet went down shows

customer service skills,

but it certainly highlights

my innovative quick thinking

by avoiding the inevitable

emotional trauma of a

family Scrabble tournament.

If you’re not already convinced

by this glowing array of positive attributes

this next one will surely

secure me the job, for I took on

the greatest responsibility of any human being:

the preservation of life.

I think you’ll agree the office orchid

is flourishing in my care,

oh, they grow so fast

when watered twice weekly and

only exposed to indirect sunlight.

I can tell you all the secrets to my success

if you offer a minimum 12 month contract

and consider ‘Muffin Mondays’

just an idea…

 

In no more than 500 words, pretend lockdown has been a beneficial opportunity for you to grow as a person, and refrain from mentioning any perfectly rational negative response to a global pandemic.

I learnt to bake roulade.

Thank you Mary Berry.

It’s all about how you whisk the cream

holding the spiral sponge together.

I learnt to value moments

like chocolate chips – my own

addition to the recipe, Mary is very

proud of me.

 

I painted my bedroom Spring Meadow.

I learnt paint can’t cover

cracks in the brickwork, they run

far too deep for even Mary’s

whipped cream to hide.

They won’t be gone in three

to five days, depending on

the lid’s recommended expiry date.

 

We’ve all been staring at walls lately.

I learnt it’s time to stop painting over

the cracks people point out. They’re

structural         and

old walls          won’t stay

standing           forever.

 

References:

1. Mary Berry

Contact details provided upon request.

 

You can find more of Ellie’s work at blueellie.wordpress.com and on her Instagram page @blueellie